Here are new pictures of Scarlett Johansson’s Moet & Chandon Ad Campaign. I guess her holding an exploding bottle is supposed to have some kind of sexual insinuation. Regrettably, at least for me, there will be nothing exploding on my end, since they completely neglected to show any tit at all. If you’re going to pay the big bucks and hire one of the best racks in the business, you better use them intelligently! So weak! I expect more from overpriced champagne.

Here Scarlett demonstrates that with Dolce & Gabbana’s eye shadow men will not be able to take their eyes away from your badly photoshopped cleavage.

Scarlett Johansson and Ryan Reynolds have been rumored to be engaged since January, even though you never see them together, but apparently things are going well because they got married this weekend. People magazine says:

Attended by only a handful of close friends and family, the ceremony was held at a remote wilderness retreat outside of Vancouver, B.C.
This is the first marriage for both. The couple had announced their engagement in May.
Johansson, 23, began dating Reynolds, 31, last year shortly after his split from singer Alanis Morissette, who recently expressed well wishes on her ex’s engagement.

Wait they got married in the woods? What, like in Braveheart? What are they, bears, knock it off you idiots.