41-year old supermodel Helena Christensen bares it all in this black and white photo shoot by acclaimed photographer Solve Sundsbo. Now, I have no idea who “Solve Sundsbo” actually is, but with an awesome name like that, my guess is on a mentally retarded immigrant with a heart of gold and a knack for cheese-based pastries. It still doesn’t explain how he got Helena Christensen naked, but that’s where I’ve got two words for you: white wizard. It just makes sense.

Jesus fucking God; there’s going to be another one of those goddamn Sex and the City movies. Like the first one wasn’t already the bane my my christforsaken existence as a gossip blogger for like six mothereffing months. I hope Sarah Jessica Parker wears another one of her zany hats to the premiere so we can all talk about it until I want to punch myself in the face.

“Not all the contracts are signed, but everyone is on board,” a source tells Us. “It just happened.”

Nixon told Us she has a few ideas for her character, feisty lawyer Miranda Hobbes. “I would love to see her and Carrie and Charlotte and Samantha all go off on some wild mad cap adventure somewhere,” she said.

True story: I visibly cringed at the phrase “mad cap adventure.” So basically, she’s thinking Thelma and Louise only with four aging whores. And yet I would actually consider going to see it if they all drove off a cliff in the end and maybe if Michael Bay did the special effects. Somebody please make that happen!

Brad Pitt left his zipper down during a photocall in Paris earlier today for his movie The Curious Case of Benjamin Button. How embarrassing. Brad must suffer from the same condition I do. Big penisitis. If you can’t figure it out, it’s when you have a hard time zipping up your pants because you have a huge penis. It’s a stigma me, and apparently Brad Pitt, have had to live with our whole lives.