Macaulay Culkin is reportedly the biological father of Blanket, Michael Jackson’s 7-year-old son, thanks to the miracle of in vitro fertilization. Culkin allegedly donated sperm to Michael when he was 21. Yeah I bet he did. It sounds like the cops showed up one day and Michael had to explain why there was a bowl of a young boys semen in his fridge.

After waiting over two months for toxicology results, the L.A. County Coroner just announced the cause of Michael Jackson’s death.

The death was ruled a homicide!

And, the official cause of death was due to Acute Propofol intoxication – along with the possibly contributing Benzodiazepine effect.

Benzodiazepines are drugs used to treat anxiety and insomnia, of which Lorazepam (Ativan), Midazolam (Versed), Diazepam (Valium), Lidocaine (topical anesthetic) and Ephedrine (used to treat hypotension associated with anesthesia) were found in his system.

Per the LAPD, the complete Coroner’s report will not be released due to security measures.

The Jackson family just released a statement:

“The Jackson family again wishes to commend the actions of the Coroner, the LAPD and other law enforcement agencies, and looks forward to the day that justice can be served.”

You may have heard something about Omer Bhatti, the 25-year-old from Norway many suspect to be Michael Jackson’s secret son. Well, Joe Jackson today confirmed that it’s true.

“Yes, I knew he had another son, yes I did,” Joe Jackson told NewsOne/TVOne of the alleged love child. “He looks like a Jackson, acts like a Jackson, can dance like a Jackson. This boy is a fantastic dancer.”

What Joe really wants to know is if Omer can make money like a Jackson? I think The Jackson 3 just became The Jackson 4! Joe’s waving his pimp hand around Omer’s head! If you look directly into Joe’s eyes and don’t turn to stone, you’ll see little glittery dollar signs forming in his pupils.