Matthew McConaughey and Camilla Alves wasted no time in whoring out exclusive first pics of their spawn, Levi to OK! for an astounding $3 million! This shit is big business! Time to make holes in the condom! OK! Magazine beat out People for the first photos of Wrangler Jeans or whatever the hell that baby’s name is.

OK! will coughed up 3 million clams for the deal which also includes baby’s first Christmas. He’s not even a week old.

Just two weeks after slobbering all over the locals and passing out in a drainage ditch in San Juan del Sur, Matthew McConaughey is officially a daddy to a baby boy. Us Weekly reports

Matthew McConaughey and Camila Alves welcomed their first child into the world Monday afternoon in Los Angeles. Alves gave birth to the as-yet-unnamed baby at 6.22 p.m. local time weighing 7 lb., 4 oz.

I’m sure Matthew is “stoked and wowed” that he has someone to follow in his footsteps. His one-flip-flopped, face-first-in-a-ditch footsteps. That kid sure has some rockin’ waxed abs to fill!

There is so much awesome here I don’t even know where to begin. Did anyone know that a) Matthew McConaughey has a brother named b) “Rooster” McConaughey who is c) a total redneck that d) named his son “Miller Lyte” and is e) getting his own reality show?!

Black Gold (premiering June 18 on truTV) takes viewers inside the race to find oil in Texas. And while Rooster does not work on an oil rig, he supplies the pipes for the drills, which typically go down 10,000 feet below the earth’s surface. That’s a lot of pipe. (Source)

Holy crap I cannot wait for this. It sounds like the brotherly resemblance is uncanny.

I forgot to mention. The show sounds boring. It would be funnier if they had put him in a dating show, like The Bachelor—Country Style. Or like The Simple Life except reversed… he could switch places with Paris Hilton or something…