Dallas pilot Jake Pavelka revealed on last night’s Bachelor finale that he will be starring on the tenth season of ABC’s “Dancing with the Stars,” along with some other equally D-list has-beens and nobodies. People Magazine says

[The season ten cast includes] astronaut Buzz Aldrin, reality star Kate Gosselin, Olympic gold medalist Evan Lysacek, actresses [Shannon] Doherty and [Pamela] Anderson, Pussycat Dolls star Nicole Scherzinger, soap star Aiden Turner, NFL star Chad Ochocinco, ESPN’s Erin Andrews, and actress-comedian Niecy Nash.

The new Dancing season kicks off March 22 on ABC.

Well, the good news is that Kate Gosselin already has her very own Asian sweatshop at her disposal. That ought to save the DWTS costume department a fortune in lycra-polyester blends and manual labor.

Kate Gosselin probably had enough of people making fun of her and her stupid hair so she went and got a new hairdo and debuted it on the cover of PEOPLE. Kate still looks ridiculous, but now in a different way. She says that with this new haircut she’s “starting over”. Again.

“It’s good to have hair again,” Kate tells People. “I never thought I’d have short hair for as long as I did. I feel like this is a fresh start, a fresh me, a fresh life.”

Later, she refers to herself as the new “Kate Clean Slate.”

“I’m rebuilding. There’s no option for this not to be a good year. Now I get to start over with a new self and new goals.”

Kate Clean Slate tried to cover up the rabid possum on her head by using Jon Gosselin’s nutsack saliva to glue Bret Michaels’ skank-covered weave scraps on top of it, but it didn’t work. The rabid possum is still there and it’s foaming at the mouth with rage that she would try to bury it under a mound of polyester hair.

With all the bullshit going on with Jon and Kate plus eight minus one plus some new chick, I don’t know what the hell’s going on anymore, you’d think that Kate Gosselin would be a little weary of all the cameras watching her every move. Evidently not, here she is flashing her panties while stuffing her face the other day. I could have proceeded through my day perfectly fine without knowing what color underwear Kate Gosselin wears, thank you very much.