Tom Brady and Gisele Bundchen were recently married in two separate ceremonies. One in Santa Monica and another in Costa Rica. Now Radar claims that Gisele has already told close friends that she’s been knocked up. This will make it Tom’s second child with a supermodel. The first one being with Bridget Moynahan.

Oh, sure Tom. Rub it in all our faces. Not only are you a quarterback for the Pats and get to bang super rich models all day, but also now we find out you’re insanely virile. Whatever dude. Fuck you and your fabulous life.

Gisele Bundchen makes the most of some acid-washed denim scraps in the August issue of V magazine, single-handedly making eighties fashion relevant again. I’m so stoked! Gisele told V Magazine that she would only do “ass shots” for Mario Testino:

“Only Mario [Testino] could make me take these pictures…. People are going to say my butt is showing too much in these but this is V Magazine! If you’re going to do something like that, you do it for V.”

Bitch, I hope the magazine also features an article on how I can make this outfit at home.

See more pics of Gis looking like a trailer trash hooker here:

Gisele Bundchen’s butt lotioner, ladies and gentlemen! He’s probably gay!

NOTE – Butt Lotioner (Profession) Man or woman charged with keeping a model’s ass nicely buffed and polished for the camera.