Click here to view the embedded video.

The effeminate young man who requested that the country lay off of Britney a bit has posted a video, the first one he’s put on YouTube since his tearful plea of September 7. (He did post some others but instantly removed them, but this one’s stayed up for a full day now.) In the video, Chris Crocker (still not his real name!) announces his return, shows us how scared he is! I am really trying to figure out if he is for real and if his amusingly eccentric Britney tantrum was real. Some things he does seem a little too subtle even for a good YouTube stunt-puller – the dialect, stumbling over words etc. Does anyone else suspect that this is a performance by a snide hipster? Anyway, Chris, nothing kills your elfin androgynous cuteness like a healthy Fred Flintstonesque five o’clock shadow…honey get a shave!

Here we see Britney’s most famous fan Chris Crocker, blowing kisses to the cameras right after purchasing his copy of Ms. Spears latest album, “Blackout.” In a blue yarn dress, Crocker smiled wide for the cameras as he certainly spouted his confidence in his diva’s abilities to launch a successful comeback. Only time will tell. Now, you need a strong drink and we have a few we can happily recommend.

On My Ass recipe

1 part cherry vodka
1 part Jack Daniel’s® Tennessee whiskey
1 part gin
1 part 151 proof rum

Pour liquors in equal parts into a shot glass. Mix once and top with a cherry.

Or

Naked on the Bathroom Floor recipe

1/2 oz tequila
1/2 oz Rumple Minze® peppermint liqueur
1/2 oz Jagermeister® herbal liqueur
1/2 oz Wild Turkey® bourbon whiskey
1/2 oz Goldschlager® cinnamon schnapps
1/2 oz DeKuyper® Hot Damn cinnamon schnapps

Mix together in a short glass, and serve.

Chris Crocker showed his little Crocker (very little) outside of Hyde last night. Well, he keeps it completely hairless like Britney. He’s a mental case, Britney better watch out. I’m sort of worried for her. This guy seems seriously obsessed and out of control. Why am I even looking? My cat has a bigger penis, and it’s a girl!

Now there is only one part of his body we have not seen and you know it’s coming. I really really don’t want to see this guy’s asshole.

Click on the pic to see it all, but your eyes will never forgive you for it.

Somebody needs to teach those boys that if he’s going to do the tranny thing he betters do it right. I mean what the hell kind of outfit is that? It looks like he found it at the Goodwill. Actually don’t laugh, that’s probably where he got it.

He’s a lot prettier here than Britney lately. She could get some fashion, makeup and grooming tips from him.

The entertainment world is in a tragic condition.

So here’s Chrissy with Alexis Arquette at the Fox Reality Awards last night.

Seth Green is freaking hilarious. We could parody Chris Crocker forever, because you know what? It’s so tragic, you just can’t look away. Like a trainwreck…Thing I can’t understand is how someone could be so dedicated to a person they’ve never even met. Poor guy lives in fantasyland…

Amazingly tragic!

Chris Crocker’s “LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE” video has already been seen over 3 million times and it hasn’t even been up for 48-hours. Chris has already spoken to Howard Stern, ABC News and he’s scheduled for CNN, The View as well as other radio stations. People are sceptical in believing that Chris’ tears are real.

Chris told ABC News that although a lot of his videos are pure entertainment this one was real. He said, “I made the video in the heat of the moment. She needs to hear someone sticking up for her. Even people who stick up for her don’t do it to the extent that I want to, I’ve been a fan since I don’t remember, and I wanted to fulfill my duty!”

Chris also told ABC that the clip posted was his second take.

He told Howard Stern that he’s a top and that he thinks Britney is a better singer that Courtney Love. He went on to say, “Who can think of 9/11 at a time like this? Britney, she is a national treasure.” Oh shit. Don’t come to NYC Chris. You’d never recover from the beating you’d receive for that statement!

Chris is going to get his own show on Vh1, trust. Vh1 execs are probably drawing up an offer as we speak!

Chris Crocker is a 19-year-old Britaholic that uses YouTube and MySpace to demonstrate his love for Britney Spears. In this clip above Chris asks the world to LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE! Chris is seriously losing it! He swears those are real tears and he’s not acting. I’m a sceptical bitch, so I’m just not sure.

This is incredible!! He’s fucking outrageous! I can’t stop laughing at him. He has a posh bob, and fabulous eyeliner, which I desperately want to know the brand!!

To borrow someone’s joke, on a gayness scale of 1 to 10, he is a 300.

P.S. – You might want to turn the volume down when you play this video, because bitch can wail!