That’s Audrina Patridge looking ridiculously hot in April’s FHM UK. Wait a minute, magazine’s usually do interviews, right? Ah crap.

Editor: “So . . . I hear you’re into coloring?”

Here’s Audrina Patridge in the latest Maxim Magazine. I do have to say that along with the usual “sensuously eating fruit pose” and the obligatory bikini and bra shots, I’m a little confused by what Maxim is hinting at with the “hose between the legs” bit. Isn’t that usually reserved for men? Are they hinting at female ejaculation, perhaps? The benefits of douching? I don’t really know. I’m going to go outside and reenact this scene, and try to get some feedback from the neighbors. Cheerio!

PETA’s newest campaign features The Hills star, Audrina Patridge. At least, I think it’s Audrina Patridge. There’s been so much retouching on the photo that I can’t tell. You can’t even identify her by her awesomely fake rack.

Here’s Audrina Patridge and her sister with the questionable chest tattoo … You see, these Audrina Patridge bikini pictures come with plenty of side boob action, which, given the size of Audrina’s ever-enlarging bust line, you’d think we’d get to see more often.

Here’s the talk of the town (for this very short “now”) Audrina Patridge from The Hills giving a go as a Pussycat Doll at Pure nightclub the other night. I don’t know about you guys, but I’m really not into this girl whatsoever, whether she’s dressed up as a Pussycat Doll or nude. I’m not sure why because she has a rocking body (maybe it’s the fact that she doesn’t have an upper lip; I’m picky that way), but she better do something fantastic very soon (like find a cure for the common cold) if she doesn’t want to be a distant pseudo-celebrity memory.

Audrina Patridge, from MTV’s “The Hills” is on the news today after some naked pictures of her appeared on the Web. “Surprisingly” these new photoso appeared just in time for the new season premiere of the show.

Although some people are speculating if she’ll stay on the show or not, I think this won’t damage anyone/anything. Marketers are very smart people and know what tricks to use to increase viewers.

What Audrina Patridge says about it?

“I took these photos years ago, when I was just out of high school and beginning to model. I was young and very trusting of others, and I didn’t know to protect myself. It is a lesson learned, for myself, and hopefully for the young girls who look up to me.”

So, let that be a lesson to any of you who are looking to start a modeling career right out of high school. Nude pics aren’t good for anything except drawing attention to yourself and getting cast on a MTV drama. Frankly, that’s all they have to offer — a dead end for sure.

Rumor has it they were pictures for a Playboy audition, but they look more like Hustler. In a couple of the racy pictures she is wearing a very short skirt, but the others show her in water just the way God made her. Audrina comes from a very wealthy family so she didn’t need to pose nude for the money. Apparently, Audrina enjoyed the shoot and was devastated when Playboy showed no interest. You can see more photos of Audrina Patridge below.

The girl waving to you is Audrina Patridge from MTV’s crime to television known as The Hills, or as I call it: “evidence that a majority of females in the 12-24 age demographic are in essence retarded.” In a moment of limitation last week, I attempted to watch an entire episode (on the whole a half hour of them shopping and talking about shopping). About five minutes in, I totally blacked out. When I woke up my TV was on fire. True story.