Kris Allen, a 23-year-old guitar-strumming folk crooner from Conway, Arkansas, was crowned American Idol 2009 on Wednesday night’s eighth Idol Finale on FOX.

Kris managed to edge out judge favorite Adam Lambert — and eleven other finalists — for this season’s win. Tonight’s two-hour finale included performances by the Black Eyed Peas, Cyndi Lauper, Carlos Santana, and Rod Stewart. Adam performed with KISS while Kris — a student — dueted with country star Keith Urban. Before the announcement, the two finalists performed “We Are The Champions” with legendary rock band Queen.

According to American Idol host Ryan Seacrest, more than 100 million votes were cast after Tuesday’s singing showdown between Allen and the San Diego-born Lambert. A record-setting 624 million votes were cast over the course of the season.

I don’t see why, because when he came on stage on with eyeliner and daddy didn’t hug me hair and sang Broadway tunes, I was under the impression he was a UFC fighter or a Navy Seal, but gay? No way, man. No way. I’m just not buying it.

The judges were unanimous when it came to American Idol hopeful Casey Carlson last night: yes, yes, yes, and hell yes. While there was nothing particularly impressive about her voice there was something very impressive about her body. Two things, to be exact.

If for some reason this whole singing thing doesn’t pan out for her, she’ll always have bikini modeling to fall back on. Anyway, I’ve set up a few lights and cameras in my basement for if she needs work.