Something must be in the water for these supermodels! First was Alessandra Ambrosio, then Heidi Klum again, and now Karolina Kurkova has just announced she’s pregnant! Her rep told People:

“Supermodel and actress Karolina Kurkova and her fiancé, film producer Archie Drury have announced that they are expecting their first child. The couple have been together for a little over a year.”

There’s a lesson to be learned here fellas. And that lesson is this: I don’t care if you’re about to bang a supermodel, if Magnum condoms aren’t available at the store, don’t settle for the regular size. Because those things will tear every time and then nine months later, BAM, kid. One night of pleasure, 18 years of responsibility. This is a disaster.

The Victoria’s Secret Angels strutted their stuff down the catwalk at a lavish show the newly-renovated Fontainebleau hotel in Miami this past weekend. There were the requisite feathers, the elaborate costuming, the diamond brassieres, and oh, yes — the boobies. Boobies, boobies, boobies.

Victoria’s Secret model Karolina Kurkova is being attacked by the Brazilian media for appearing too fat on the runway. Kurkova was slammed in the country for appearing in a bikini with what critics called “back fat, love handles and cellulite” at the Cia Maritima show during Sao Paulo Fashion Week.

Back fat aside, I also think it’s odd that Karolina seems to be missing her bellybutton. Perhaps her back ate it.

Damn, I’m moving to St. Barth! The last time I stripped down naked in a car here in California I got six months in prison. Classical police bullshit, too, irritates a guy who was just trying to sleep it off for the night instead of getting behind the wheel and driving drunk. And I know the car wasn’t exactly “mine” and was in a locked garage and that garage was behind a ten foot security wall but, c’mon, that’s just semantics.

REMINDER: I don’t want to be a marine biologist when I grow up; I wanna be the guy that bends down to put the shoes on the supermodel.

I don’t even think the whole threesome thing with Brad, Angelina, and Karolina Kurkova is true, but anyway, she has a nice body and butt so here are some pictures of her! Czech supermodel and Victoria’s Secret Angel Karolina Kurkova was spotted at a photoshoot in New York City sporting super small shorts and some cellulite.